Update: The great Laguiole swindle.

Last week at my wine group lunch at Oyster (35 Little Bourke St, Melbourne 300 Vic +61 3 9650 0988) I couldn’t help but notice the steak knives. They have the classic shape and even the trademark bee. But sorry, these are not Laguiole but a blatant copy by Maxwell & Williams. I am very surprised that they have got away with it, or do they have a licensing deal with Laguiole? This is what the Laguiole website says: “Laguiole […]


Coffee machine distributor penalised $280,000

I’ve been researching a new coffee machine after my crappy first generation Chinese import lost puff. If a machine is any good, there is usually a massive cost differential between what I could buy it for overseas and in Australia. Then poking around the Australian Competition and Consumer Commission website for a story for The Australian, I found the press release below. I think we’ll find quite a few other companies that import kitchen paraphernalia taking the piss out of […]


My favourite gadget: a little ray of sunshine

The electric juicer hasn’t left the cupboard for over a year. It seemed like a good idea at the time but in reality it is simply a sugar machine. Far better I say to cut out the middle man – the juicer – and simply eat the whole fruit, with peel if possible. That gives me sugar, nutrients and, importantly, roughage. And that means I don’t have to lurk in a dark corner at the pharmacist buying Proctologist & Gamble’s […]

Cooking, Paraphernalia

Thai supper without Stephen Hawking

INGREDIENTS 3 cups coconut milk 1 cup chicken/prawn stock or water tad of salt palm sugar cup of cubed pumpkin 6 fresh deveined and peeled prawns and six dried shrimp, rinsed ground white pepper Paste 1 tablespoon or so dried prawns salt 3-4 red shallots, chopped finely 3-4 coriander roots, chopped finely 8-10 white peppercorns It wasn’t have been Jamie Oliver’s fault. At least I don’t think so. I started off in Sydney with a small pestle & mortar. It […]

coffee, Ingredients & produce, Paraphernalia, Vietnam

Weasel poo coffee – as posh as pig’s arseholes

We are a coffee granule free zone. But I do have half a kilo of some stuff that passed out of a Weasel’s backside. At least in Vietnam they call it weasel. It is a civet and the beans are poohed out, it having eaten the coffee berries. Some poor bugger collects the droppings and (hopefully) washes them before roasting. It makes a very, very dark coloured bean and a very strong dark coffee. J says it even tastes of […]


The confronting choice: Knives or chopsticks?

What do you prefer to eat with? Sometimes I just want to rip in their with my hands. Take a shrimp/prawn. Am I really going to piss around peeling it with a knife and fork? Aren’t I going to rip that rustic sour dough and dip it in the olive oil? Tiny lamp chops make me lose control. Cut out the middleman and shove it straight in your gob. I mentioned a few entries ago about the ludicrous guest nights […]


Never mind the baking tins this is the bollocks

If a kitchen object were ever to feature in SEX, this would be it. I’m not talking about the hot sweaty act but the (in)famous shop on the Kings road in London. The one that was run by designer Vivienne Westwood and pop Svengali Malcolm McLaren about the same time he launched the Sex Pistols. I don’t suppose many readers would have visited Sex. As a teenager I was lucky enough to. I didn’t have the cash for bondage pants, […]


Ready to shave Mr Zimba

Graters. Boring things that rust, dent and occasionally graze the knuckle. Mandolins. Violent razor sharp slicers equally at home in the kitchen or an Iraqi prison. Imagine if you could combine the benefits of both and build a grater you could put to use in inquisitions in some godforsaken foreign prison. Cuisipro, a Canadian company, has done it with it astonishingly good Accutec grater range. If you are wondering how to shave perfect curls of parmesan, chocolate, radish, garlic… or […]